Part 3
Author: Susan McNeill

 

The next morning, Savannah slipped quietly out of bed. Kermit had tossed and turned all night long, as if he were fighting something in his sleep. Finally, he seemed to be resting peacefully. She showered and dressed, leaving him to rest. Kat was ready for breakfast.
While the baby rested in her arms, gobbling her first bottle of the day, her mother stared into space, her worry from the previous night coming back to her mind. She'd let things drop last night because of their guests. Now, she kept replaying his excuse over and over in her mind. "Lost track of time." Kermit Griffin never lost track of anything, especially time. Especially not two hours! And he STILL didn't give her an answer as to why he didn't call her!

His behavior after everyone had gone was even more atypical and alarming. Savannah had gotten caught up in the passion of the moment. Now, in the light of day, she could see how odd Kermit's reactions had been. He had always 'invited' her into sex. Never imposed himself that way. After this little incident, he'd seemed literally filled with shame. Afraid that he'd hurt her. Almost begging forgiveness. In his sleep, he'd mumbled and tossed. Savannah couldn't understand the word he had repeated continuously in his sleep.

"Good morning," Kermit greeted as he walked into the living room and took Kat into his arms. She gurgled and pumped her arms in excitement. "Sorry I missed you last night, Kitty Kat," he said, closing his eyes and placing his cheek against hers as he gave her a gentle squeeze.

Savannah got up from the sofa and wrapped her arms around both of them. "Do you want some breakfast?"

"No, thanks. I'm late already." Kermit kissed the top of her head and smiled. "Why don't you come downtown and we can have lunch. Let me make up for leaving you holding the bag with that idiot last night?"

She erupted with laughter. "Oh, he's not THAT bad. Just not quite housebroken."

The sound of her laughter always made him feel lighter. In spite of it, this bright world that she and Kat had made for him seemed suddenly foreign. He couldn't grasp why. He was here. But something was pulling him away. No matter how hard he fought it. How hard he pulled on the leash. It was winning....

"Hey, Earth to Daddy!" Savannah was calling in his ear. "Are you all right?"

Snapping back to reality, he replied, "Oh, yeah. Just tired." A lie was much better than the truth.

"Can't imagine why." She reached up and kissed his cheek. He was lying. They both knew it. "See you at noon, okay?"

Kermit left the baby in her swing and escaped to his car.

As he drove, Kermit tried in vain to push the memory of his disgusting behavior from his mind. What he'd done to Peter the night before was unthinkable. Yes, he was angry and frustrated and confused, but all Peter did was call him on being late. Savannah and Peter were friends. Sure, he'd been pissed after watching her wait and worry for two hours.
Kermit didn't have any explanation. About being late or about blasting Peter. All Kermit had intended to do was deflect the questions. Give himself some time to figure out exactly what happened. Not throw every jealous, bitter thought into his friend's face. Peter had saved his ass more times than he could count. With his shoot-first-don't-wait-for-backup attitude, Savannah would be dead and buried. No wife. No baby. No Kermit. He owed Peter for everything precious in his life. Regardless of all this, the anger he'd felt the night before overshadowed everything. It was anger born of helplessness.
Helplessness and terror from those images of imprisonment and torture. He'd been backed into a corner and questioned then with no recourse. No one was ever going to do that again. Kermit could only be grateful that he had only chosen words to battle with last night. At least with Peter.

The incident with his wife shook him to the core. She didn't understand what had happened. Thought it was merely passion out of control. He'd tried to apologize. Tried to explain to her that something was wrong. She loved him too much to hear.

Kermit knew what he'd done. Used that precious, kind person as a tool to vent his frustration. When he'd come back into the house, there wasn't a single organized thought running through his brain. Fear, anger, frustration. Not love. As if he were only watching as someone else manipulated his body. Someone else using his wife.

If she had reacted in another way, he wasn't sure what would have happened. Would he have snapped to his senses? The alternative made him want to vomit. Would he have hurt her? A day ago, he would have believed that he could never hurt her, no matter what. Now, he wasn't sure. Of anything.

Where had he been for two hours? Why was he suddenly filled with uncontrollable violence and hatred? Why could he hear that vile sound in the back of his mind even now?

The phone rang. Kermit answered. In an instant, his will faded away.

As if drawn by a magnet, he found himself in front of a warehouse at the dock. Numbly, he entered. The metronome sat silently in front of him. A brutal reminder of what could be. What would be if he didn't comply. He sat down to wait for instructions.

One of them shoved a photograph into his hand. An all-too-familiar face. The traitor who'd thrown him into this hell. Given him up to the enemy. All the suffering originated with this slithering piece of trash. Fury bubbled up from his gut into his throat. He would blow him to hell. For himself and all the others.

In his ear, he could hear the instructions. A map of steps to follow to the goal. Kermit catalogued each detail and nodded his understanding. Then came the brutal warning....

TICK! TICK! TICK!....

The sound paralyzed him. He fell to the floor, as he had all those years before. On his knees, begging. Willing to do any task to buy his freedom from the pain. Screaming with agony at the injustice. At his weakness. Hopeless and helpless. Defeated.

******

Kermit came strolling casually into the office but stopped dead still at the sight of the clock. Ten o'clock. He frowned. *Why the hell isn't it nine o'clock?*

Captain Simms, obviously angry and being quite overt in her displeasure, shouted through her open doorway, "So nice of you to join us, Detective Griffin! Out making the streets of Sloanville crime-free, no doubt."

"Yes, ma'am," he called flippantly. "We can all go home now."

Karen slammed her door and Kermit grinned in satisfaction. If he felt this 'off', he should share it. Before he went to work, though, he had another obstacle. Peter Caine.

Peter had positioned himself between Kermit and his office. No detour available. *Paul would kick your ass if he knew about last night,* Kermit thought. He took a deep breath and headed over to his friend. At least, he hoped Peter was still his friend.

Before Peter could speak, Kermit offered, "All I can say is that I had a bad day and took it out on you. Sorry."

Peter was stuck between his still-simmering hurt feelings and shock. Even though the apology was half-hearted in Peter's opinion, he'd never heard Kermit Griffin apologize for anything, with the exception of what he said to his wife last night. Anger temporarily defused, Peter replied, "Well, I was just worried about the two of you. You've got a good thing with Savannah and that little girl. Don't screw it up."

Kermit didn't answer. Only shook his head and walked around Peter and into his office. Immediately, he went to work. But it wasn't his work. He didn't know whose work. It took him a while but he got through. The blueprints flashed up onto the computer screen and, after a quick inspection, he printed a hardcopy. Next, he hacked into the 98th precinct database. What he was searching for took even longer. Security detail information for the upcoming event at the Convention Center. One quick click and he had the hardcopy to add to his collection.

He had memorized almost all of it when it finally began to dawn that he had no idea why he wanted this information. Blankly, he stared at the papers in his hands. The drive to retrieve the information had been unstoppable. Confusion began to set it. *What-?!*
A familiar, grating voice jerked him back to reality. "YO! Hey, Kermit! Great time last night!" Wolf Gannett walked into his office, bold as brass and sat down. He was lifting up his boot....

"Put your feet on my desk and die."

Peter heard the exchange and decided not to intervene. Maybe if Kermit annihilated Wolf like he did Peter last night, they could be rid of him for a day or two.

"Why don't I just follow you around today - you don't look busy - and get some more dope on the mercenary biz?" Wolf was studying Kermit like an insect. Trying to soak up something he could add to his routine.

"Fine," Kermit said lazily, leaning back slightly in his chair. "Here's your first lesson...."

Wolf came closer at Kermit's beckoning finger. When the actor was in whispering range, Kermit jabbed a finger painfully into his ribs. "Never trust anybody," he advised.

"OW! Shit, man!" Wolf howled, holding his side. "That hurt!"

"Good. You'll learn faster."

"Okay, ya'll. Am I going to have to separate you two?" Savannah stood in the doorway, Baby Kat in her arms, smiling.

"Please," Kermit replied, groaning his relief. He unthinkingly stashed the paperwork in a drawer and got up to greet his family. He took the baby from her, automatically replacing his scowl with a grin for his little girl.

"Ready for lunch?" Savannah was relieved to find him in a normal frame of mind. At least as normal as could be expected for Kermit.

"Oh, yeah."

As they turned to go, Wolf relentlessly tailed them. "Hey, wait! I'll buy! Where are you going?"

"Somewhere you're not!" came Kermit's reply as they left the room.

Savannah watched Kermit lie on the floor that evening, playing with their daughter. He seemed relaxed and happy. As he always did when they were together. Kat would squeal and giggle and sparkle. Whatever cloud was following him, it wasn't visible at the moment. This child was like the sun for him. For both of them.

When the doorbell rang, Savannah turned to see Wolf and Peter through the window. *Wolf! Just what he needs right now.* She opened the door reluctantly, too polite to tell them that this wasn't a good time.

"Hey there, dollface." Wolf strolled into Savannah's kitchen with Peter in tow.

Savannah rolled her eyes. It seemed hopeless to continue trying to shed her new nickname. "Hello, Wolf. What can I do for you, as if I didn't know?"

"Forgot my sunglasses the other night....Hi ya' man. What's shakin'?" He had spied Kermit and joined him in the living room. Crouching down to look at the baby, he added,

"Hey, cutie. Come to Uncle Wolf."

"Hands off!" Kermit glared at him.

"Aw, come on. We're good buddies after the other night." Wolf tickled her tummy and got a toothless grin in return.

"Why are you here?"

Peter decided to jump in. "Just for the glasses, then we're leaving. Right, Wolf?"
"Welllll...since I'm here, why not get some more material." Wolf plopped down in a chair, beginning to annoy Kermit past his breaking point.

"So, man. How'd you get started as a mercenary? Bet you were in 'Nam, right?"

Kermit's expression evolved from relaxed to annoyance in seconds. "Yes."

"All you guys are regular 'killing machines'. That where you picked up all your tricks?"

"Want to find out?" Kermit rose menacingly from his place beside Kat and positioned himself in front of the actor.

"Kermit. Stop trying to scare the poor guy to death," Savannah laughed, trying to defuse his volatile state.

"STOP TELLING ME HOW TO BEHAVE!" He whirled and shouted into her face.

She stood there, stunned. Before she could react, Kermit rained down on Wolf once again. "That's right, fancy pants. We're all fuckin' crazy! Could kill you at the drop of a hat before you could blink. You want research, dammit, you came to the right place. You want some nut to imitate in one of those fucked up movies for a bunch of twelve-year-olds? I'm your man! I'm as evil and screwed up as they come!"

Waving his hands at his wife and his friend, he offered, "Just ask them. They'll tell you! I've killed more people than you've ever met!" Leaning down into Wolf's rattled face, he added, "And I'm good at it. I'm the best. So just keep testing me and you'll find out first-hand!" With that final flourish, he stalked out of the house.

For a moment, they all remained silent in the wake of the storm. Then Wolf pulled out a notebook and began to callously jot down notes. "Man, this is great stuff! 'I've killed more people than you've ever met.' Fans will eat this stuff up!"

Eyes filled with tears of frustration and hurt, Savannah unloaded on the first victim she could find. Wolf. "YOU JERK! This isn't some movie script you can rewrite if you don't like the dialogue. This is his life! The things he's been through have left scars on him you can't run to the plastic surgeon and have removed. If you could ever shed the pseudo-life you lead and act like a human being for a change, maybe you'd be moved by someone else's pain!"

Peter put his arms around her. Not knowing how to repair her pain or Kermit's.

"Oh, God, Peter," Savannah asked, wiping her tears away. "What's wrong with him?"

"I didn't want to say anything," Peter began, "but I guess it's relevant now. He blew up at me last night just after we left."

Savannah pulled away from him, shocked. *That explains a LOT of his behavior last night.* She looked in Peter's eyes and saw the pain inside. "It was that bad?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah, it was that bad," Peter said. "Kermit knows all the right buttons to push. I demolished two punching bags at the gym before my dad showed up and figured out that Kermit deliberately pissed me off so I wouldn't ask him any more questions."

"Questions?"

"I only asked him where he was that made him so late!" Peter said. "I didn't think that was any cause to blow off my head with a double-barreled shotgun!"

"No, it wasn't." She shook her head, while giving him a sympathetic hug. "He was behaving strangely when he came back inside. I should have known that something had happened but I didn't put it together until this morning."

"What was strange about his behavior?"

She wasn't about to go into details. "Not mean or anything, like just now, but just...uh...very intense. And what he did to Wolf went far beyond the usual punches he throws at him. Something is terribly wrong, Peter. Kermit has never even raised his voice in the same room with Kat."

Wolf was trying to stay out of the conversation. He'd dropped down beside the baby, who seemed oblivious to the anger that had traveled right over her head. Kat was twisting his finger and grinning. *You're a real shit, Gannett,* he mulled over in his mind. He realized that he had let his mouth run over and felt responsible for the trouble in this happy home.

These were nice people, especially her. After he'd acted like a total jerk at the precinct, she'd invited him into her home and treated him like a guest. Now, because of some freakin' movie deal that hadn't even been signed yet, everything was messed up. She was really crazy about that guy with the bad attitude just like he was crazy about her. *Nobody ever cared about me like that.*

Wolf got up and sauntered over to Savannah like a guilty five-year-old. "Ummm...like, hey, I'm real sorry about this, dollface. Sometimes I just forget how to act around...uh...well, I'm sorry."

Savannah understood his sentiment. He had shot off his mouth but he wasn't a bad guy. What was going on here was bigger than that. "Wolf, it's okay. I don't think this has anything to do with you." She looked up at Peter. "He needs help, Peter."

"I'm going to look for him," Peter assured her, already moving toward the door. "Will you be all right here?"

"Peter, don't be ridiculous. He's mad but he's not dangerous. Kermit would never do anything to hurt us. Besides, I think Wolf's put Kat to sleep."

Looking down, they saw Kat peacefully napping in the middle of impending disaster.

******

Once again, Kermit was overwhelmed with fury. It pounded in his temples. Pounded with rhythm and intensity. Slamming his car into gear, he screeched from his driveway. He had to get away from them before he lost control again. One moment, he'd been sitting beside his daughter, basking in her innocence. The next moment, he'd felt murderous rage. Right in the same room with her. He could have taken Wolf apart with that rage. Two feet from his child. And for what provocation? The man was an idiot, true enough, but not malicious.

What he'd done to his wife was ever worse. It made him sick when he realized that part of that fury he'd felt spilled onto her. If he'd been standing closer to her, what would he have done? As unbalanced as Kermit felt at this moment, he could have hurt her. That was his fear. He was losing control. Since yesterday, it had been draining and he was nearly empty.

The phone rang.

Kermit didn't want to answer. Clamping his hands on the steering wheel, he fought. The ringing continued. Relentlessly. In an involuntary motion, he answered.

TICK! TICK! TICK!....

There could be no resistance. There would be no mercy. What will he had slipped away.
The present melted away. Back to the horror of that pain and defeat. Spilling his guts like a guilty child. Once done, it could never be taken back inside. They tortured him and controlled him and would always. To avoid the agony, he'd do or say anything.

They were in his mind. Calling the tune. At their beck and call, he would respond. Without choice. Without voice. Without reason.

There was no defense. He gave in and followed the voice on the phone.

*****

Savannah waited and worried for what felt like an eternity. The clock told her it had only been a little over an hour but it still felt like forever. At long last, she heard the back door SLAM! She raced to it to see her bedraggled husband, looking like he hadn't slept in a week. She rushed to him and put his arm around her as she helped him inside.

"I can't stay, Scarlett," he mumbled in her ear as he stumbled inside.

Ignoring this, she put all her concentration on helping him inside. She guided him to his favorite stuffed chair, hoping it would anchor him. He sat down heavily as she took a moment to assess his condition. He was sweating and gasping for breath, like he had been running...or crying. He was shaking all over so she grabbed the afghan draped over the couch and covered him up. When she tried to take off his glasses, he moved his hand automatically to intercept so she let them be.

Savannah thought swiftly, running through options in her mind. She couldn't call Caine because he didn't have a phone. She couldn't call Peter in front of Kermit; it might set Kermit off again. *Oh, God,* she thought desperately, *help me out - I don't know what to do!* She held him, which seemed to be the best thing she could have thought of, for he leaned into her touch, as if trying to draw comfort and support from her very body. She held him tighter and he sighed in contentment.

Finally, he drew back a little. Not able to look at her in the eyes. Kept his gaze to the floor. He was unwilling to break free from her despite every impulse he felt to do so. "I can't stay," he repeated.

"What are you talking about?" she asked softly, stroking his hair. Maybe if she just kept him there, talking and resting, he would calm down.

He just shook his head. "I warned you. I warned you but you wouldn't listen...."

"I don't care," she said, kissing his forehead. "I love you."

"I have to go," he said woodenly. Suddenly, his face contorted as he grabbed her around her waist and buried his face into her soft chest. "Oh, God, I have to go...."

She held on tighter. Perhaps some assertiveness was called for. "Do you feel this?" she demanded, her voice still gentle but her tone was firm. "Do you? I'm not letting go of you. Ever."

"You have to, Scarlett," he mumbled. "Don't you understand? I MIGHT HURT YOU! I might hurt Kat! Savannah...I don't know where I've been or what I've been doing!"

"What?" she gasped, looking at him.

He looked up at her briefly and returned his head resting on her chest. "I've been phasing out...back to 'Nam," he told her. "It's so damm REAL...I can even smell the place! When I snap out of it, I don't know what's happened. Those two hours I was missing for the dinner party....I DON'T REMEMBER WHERE I WAS! I got in the car and it was 7:10. The next thing I knew, it was 9:30! I could have been anywhere! I could have DONE anything! I don't remember! It's happened three times now! I can't fight it...I can't fight them...."

"Kermit...who's THEM?"

He made a supreme effort, broke free from her grasp, tore off the afghan and leaped to his feet. "I'm going now," he told her. "If I'm going to go nuts, I'm not about to do it here where you and Kat might be hurt. Don't you understand? I MIGHT HURT YOU!"

"I don't believe that for one second, Kermit Griffin!" she stated firmly, going to him. He backpedaled at her approach.

"You should, dammit," Kermit said, fear in his every movement. "I'm not in control here! I'm losing my mind! Just stay away from me! I don't want you hurt!"

"Kermit...just calm down-"

The phone interrupted and Savannah dove for it, praying that it would be Peter or someone that could help. Kermit got to it first.

"Hello!"

Savannah watched incredulously as her emotional, passionate husband suddenly stood straight as an arrow, as emotionless as a statue. "Kermit?" she asked. "Who is it?"
Kermit just listened, not moving an iota. Savannah knew she could pick up on the extension but was reluctant to leave him alone. She walked carefully to him and reached out to take the receiver from him....

Seconds later, she was on the floor. She looked up at him - she hadn't even seen him move! Thankfully, though, she realized that she was not hurt. Kermit had used just enough force to propel her away from him but he did not hurt her. She nodded to herself, now firmly convinced that Kermit would not hurt her no matter what.
In the meantime, she HAD to know what was being said over the phone. She had no choice; she got up and walked swiftly to the bedroom and lifted the receiver.

What she heard made no sense to her. It was a foreign language, certain words being repeated over and over again. In the background was a TICK! TICK! TICK!
She scrambled to find a piece of paper to try to write down the words before she forgot them.

Suddenly, the line went dead. She dropped the phone and raced back to the kitchen. Kermit was picking up his keys.

"Kermit, who was that? What's going on?"

He ignored her as if she didn't even exist. He left out the back door. Savannah watched, wishing she could stop him but there was nothing she could do. Except call for help.
She watched the Corvair speed away as she dialed a number. "Detective Peter Caine, please," she asked. "It's an emergency...."

 

Part 1   Part 2   Part 3   Part 4   Part 5   Part 6  

Back to serie's index      Back to Story index